Goal 4: Be comfortable speaking in front of a group

If your child is struggling with out of game challenges:

• The early / easier challenges are just as important as the later/harder ones. Don’t be tempted to overlook them as too easy. Doing those challenges sets children up to believe they can do this.

• Ask your child how they think they could customise these. They often have creative ideas!

• Don’t worry if one of the earlier challenges seems harder for your child than some of the later ones. All children are different.

• As a parent, have a think about the ultimate goal, and whether you’re happy for your child to get most of the way through and anything extra is a bonus. For example, you might be happy to see your child stay at home while you nip to the shops for an hour, or perhaps being able to go places where there might be insects but not necessarily needing to hold a big spider. 

• Children often benefit throughout all the challenges by using the breathing techniques they’re taught in the “imagine” challenge. Remind them to relax and take slow, deep breaths at the start of each challenge.

• Make it fun! For example, if your young person is worried about being in the dark, let your child put you in a dark room for a bit and see how you cope.

Customising out of game challenges

CHALLENGES: 4-8

4. Read aloud at home

Ways to customise this challenge: practise reading alone first.

1. If it is too difficult to read in front of family members, ask your child to read aloud alone in front of a mirror.

2. When they’re ready, they could make a video or audio recording to watch or listen to alone, or to watch or listen to with family members. 

3. After reading alone, the next time have them read aloud with you or another family member while you’re occupied with something else. For example, have them read while you’re cooking, while the television is on, or while you’re listening to music so that your focus isn’t entirely on them.

4. Start with only one family member and gradually add more.

You can encourage your child by saying:

• “A lot of people worry about talking in front of other people. But I know you’re brave enough to give it a try!” 

• “Remember that feeling worried is totally normal, but those bad feelings will go away and you’ll be alright.”
  

Tips: 

• Let your child choose something enjoyable and easy to read, and have them listen while you read it aloud a few times before they try it.

5. Read aloud at home and answer a question

Ways to customise this challenge: Let your child choose the questions.

1. Give your child plenty of time to choose and prepare what they want to read for you.

2. To begin, let them come up with their own questions they know they can answer and share them with you before they read.

3. As they build their confidence, begin asking an extra question they didn’t prepare ahead of time.

You can encourage your child by saying:

• “You’re being so brave by reading aloud to me. I’m proud of you!” 

• “Even if you feel worried, think about how far you’ve already come!”
  
  Tips:

• If your child is struggling to come up with questions, make some simple suggestions to help them out. For example, you might ask about a character’s name, the title of what they read, what happened at the end, etc.

• Start with easy questions to help them feel confident enough to answer.

6. Read aloud to a few friends at school

Ways to customise this challenge: Take turns reading with one friend.

1. Help your child choose one friend they feel more comfortable reading with.

2. Start by having your child read a very small amount and then have their friend do the same. For example, your child can read one sentence, and then their friend can read one.

3. Gradually increase the amount that your child reads, and as they feel more comfortable, invite another friend to join. Ask your child whether they want you and/or the teacher to be there, too.

4. Like before, your child might feel more comfortable if their friend is also doing something else. Turn on music, have their friend wear headphones, or even have them read aloud at the same time to begin with.

5. It may also help to start somewhere outside the classroom, like the playground or even at a park. 

You can encourage your child by saying:

• “It’s totally normal to feel scared when you have to talk in front of other people. But we all have to do it sometimes, and I’m really proud of you for trying!” 

• “You’ve already done so well! Let’s keep going!”
  
  Tips:

• If your child is unsure or uncomfortable choosing a friend to read to, ask your child’s teacher to help arrange with another student who they know would be kind and supportive while your child practises.

• Tell the teacher and your child’s friend or classmate that your child feels a little worried about talking in front of other people and would really like them to help practise.

7. Read aloud to the teacher and answer a question

Ways to customise this challenge: Talk to your child’s teacher first.

1. Tell your child’s teacher that they feel worried about talking in front of the class and let them know about all the practise they’ve already been doing. Let their teacher know that it’s really important to tell your child they’re doing a great job even if they’re nervous or struggling and have to stop.

2. Use the same strategies from earlier challenges in this goal - have your child read only a sentence at a time and ask their teacher to read, too. Turn on music, give the teacher headphones, or ask them to read aloud at the same time. 

3. When your child is ready to try answering a question, let them choose easy questions to prepare ahead of time, and then have the teacher ask a new one when they’re ready.

4. Ask your child whether they want you and/or their friends to be there, too. And if it’s still too difficult, ask your child if they want to practise somewhere outside the classroom first. 

You can encourage your child by saying:

• “Think about all the progress you’ve already made! You’ve done such a great job facing your fears!” 

• “It’s ok to feel worried about this, but I know you can give it a try. If you need to stop and take a break that’s fine, too, and we’ll just try it again later.”
  

Tips:

• Don’t worry if your child needs to stop in the middle of a challenge - reading one-on-one with a teacher can be really difficult.

• Make sure they know it’s ok if they need to take a break and tell them you’re proud of them for trying.

• Make a plan to try again soon.

8. Read aloud in front of your class

Ways to customise this challenge: Start with a small group.

1. Talk to your child’s teacher to arrange a time for them to practise reading aloud to a small group instead of starting with the whole class.

2. Gradually make the group larger until they’re ready to read in front of the whole class.

You can encourage your child by saying:

• “This is a really difficult challenge, and I’m so proud of you for making it this far!” 

• “Let’s talk about all the things you’ve already done to practise and remember how brave you’ve been”

Tips:

• The more you can help your child feel like they have some control over the situation, the easier it will be for them to give it a try.

• Be sure to talk to them before you share with the teacher so they know what you’ll tell the teacher and they have a chance to add anything else to it.

• Talk to your child and their teacher after the challenge to see how it went and how you can help them try it again.

• Keep practicing until your child feels confident enough to read aloud in class without preparing for it ahead of time.

Common questions